The Clock Has Struck 12...

As I look at this glass slipper I'm holding, I know she's out there. I know that as I look at my reflection tilting the slipper from side to side, I begin to wonder if I'm ready, truly ready, for the woman God is preparing me for. I know that I may not be the man He continues to challenge me to become. I am persistently patient, anxious, and excited. It's past midnight and I stand in reflection on the proverbial steps of life; I'm okay with waiting. I'm accepting that God has something wonderful prepared for me, and when I become ready, He will present opportunity in a way He deems fitting.

Its not that I'm wondering why or when or how, but its more along the lines of whether I'm worth what this slipper represents. I'd like to think that I emulate these prince-like qualities; I'm realizing more and more that I am not the man I am going to be. As I bow my head on bended knee, I realize that God is at work in my life. I stand, look up and smile, and with gratitude, I know good works are occurring.

I know that there are experiences I can only pursue with Him as a single man. And He knows me better than I could ever know myself. Knowing that I desire more than anything to be a loving husband and father, in large part to better understand His love for me. I think that as Christians, by having our own children and loving them beyond what can be expressed helps us to understand how He loves and cares for us. I feel that step -- building a family -- creates in us opportunity to develop a deeper relationship with God. Not only does He want that for us; He continues to prepare us for when the time will be right.

As I continue to pursue with a single heart, I look forward for the fitting.. For the woman that God is preparing for me. And when the time is right, when the moment comes, I will love and honor God by loving and honoring her.

'Oh-Seven'

A lot has happened in the past year. Many, many surprises. Some good, some not so good, but in the end its brought me to today, and today is a good day.

I've been thinking about what to focus on this year, what should be my resolution for 2007. I've realized that what I need, what I desire most is to simplify. To get back to the basics and to focus on the things that matter most. Its not about what I need to achieve or accomplish...its not about accolades. I need to drop some weight, shed some all the stuff that continues to drag me down. I need to focus on the guts, the heart of the matter...I need to give of myself to others, my time and my talents. I need to be patient, to wait on God. I need to be a witness and a warrior in His name. To continue to be filled with gratitude, and continue to give all that I can. I desire to build a stronger relationship.... I desire to fulfill His will.

So what does this mean... It means that I will continue to be still, continue to use the time borrowed to me to the best of my abilities. And I will be thankful... and full of grace.

I kick 'Oh-Seven' off with an expectation for growth and courage.

NYE Debacle

I had made a commitment to go to an 80's themed party, which to be honest, I was super excited for, I also had been invited to another friends, which I know would have been great fun. So I apologize greatly to you two for not coming... but maybe its karma, because here is what my night ended up looking like:

There's really one reason why I decided to go where I did. The weather. I know, poor excuse, but I have a rear wheel drive vehicle, and my roommate was convincing me to attend his friends party, so I figured it would be safer and less driving if we just went out together. So off we went. We got there, and it was pretty quiet initially, and most of the people of were expected didn't show because of previous said reason. I can't fault them, but I at least ventured somewhere.... so pretty lame. But the tone of the night was set about 20 minutes into the party when a group of guys, 7 or so, started coming through the back door. One of the guys was swearing, the others were laughing and prodding.. whatever, I did what I shouldn't have done. I went to see what the deal was. As the guy walked in, he puckered up and asked for a kiss... I turned my cheek, kissed me, but unsatisfied demanded that I kiss him on the lips... WTF--Stupid drunk gay people... for real. But, I figured just to get it over with, what the hell... I gave him his peck, then he pursued to ask if I was gay... go figure. We had eleven queens in the house and only two of them were actually of the female sex. That should have been my sign right there to leave... We ended up playing a drinking game, and Texas hold-em. It wasn't my night to play cards either. My first hand I went all in with pocket aces, and got my ass handed to me by a guy holding a three -card. Whatever... the next game I came back and had three-quarter of the chips when my roommate (because his recent girl was calling) decided to continue to go all in.... The chump drew 4 pairs in a row, not to mention a jack/king... and he beat me on pocket aces. It was not my night for cards. And the only action I got was from a some drunk drama queen bitching about his sterling silver chain getting wet in the snow.

But I did manage to avoid another kissing queen. After counting down, one of the guys was making his rounds, after kissing my roommate (which I found pretty entertaining), he leaned over to kiss me, before I could react, he slipped and fell behind the chair dumping is drink all over himself. That was funny... but by the time he gathered himself, he had aborted said mission to go clean up.

While driving home, Matt and I decided that was the wrong party to attend. So next year. There is always next year. Three hundred sixty-four more days before a new-year's redemption.